I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Randomize
