I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
My Sexting was not on an AP level
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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