then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
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