the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
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