At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
