I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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