If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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