the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
