Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
