Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
