So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
