so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
