So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize
