Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
