dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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