Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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