Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
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