Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
cat food counts as protein by the way
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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