also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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