Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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