sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Randomize
