What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
