Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
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