its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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