I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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