Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Randomize
