im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
