I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
