Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
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