I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
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