then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
