I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
