I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
