Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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