I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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