Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Well douche your snatch and let's go!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): Well douche your snatch and let's go! http://tfl.nu/3ukm
  Replies (5) Good night (1466) Bad night (723)
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (318): That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch http://tfl.nu/faw2
  Replies (4) Good night (1243) Bad night (518)
• Favorite

  (626): View more from California

  I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (626): I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong. http://tfl.nu/s8qo
  Replies (46) Good night (520) Bad night (1409)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck. http://tfl.nu/pefb
  Replies (8) Good night (1454) Bad night (1204)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol http://tfl.nu/jhs1
  Replies (54) Good night (1627) Bad night (3302)
• Favorite

  (808): View more from Hawaii

  I need to stop coming to work sober

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (808): I need to stop coming to work sober http://tfl.nu/5deo
  Replies (10) Good night (3326) Bad night (788)
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (251): the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville. http://tfl.nu/cwli
  Replies (37) Good night (1145) Bad night (5010)
• Favorite

  (361): View more from Texas

  After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (361): After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge. http://tfl.nu/26oy
  Replies (14) Good night (4960) Bad night (1235)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick. http://tfl.nu/7vfn
  Replies (3) Good night (485) Bad night (1483)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed http://tfl.nu/pn7a
  Replies (4) Good night (944) Bad night (502)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way. http://tfl.nu/bqx1
  Replies (4) Good night (1578) Bad night (395)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (989): Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady. http://tfl.nu/qu2m
  Replies (48) Good night (1339) Bad night (2915)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it. http://tfl.nu/4zf0
  Replies (4) Good night (600) Bad night (340)
• Favorite

  (928): View more from Arizona

  So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (928): So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time http://tfl.nu/6mpm
  Replies (5) Good night (1279) Bad night (223)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (905): So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on http://tfl.nu/azx1
  Replies (2) Good night (252) Bad night (882)

Randomize