Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
