You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
