i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize
