I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
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