i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Randomize
