I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
