Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I woke up under a house in Key West
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