my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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