Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
why do cheetos always look like penises
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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