we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
