dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
My ATM looks so different sober.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
