He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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