.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Randomize
