So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
This is the high leading the old right now
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If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
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On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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