it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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